Successful relationships are relationships that have good standing in terms of respect, self love, truth, discipline & loyalty. (You can disagree) What are your strengths in your current relationship & what are your weaknesses ? Everyone has inbuilt strengths & weakness, if you haven’t taken time to know them then this article would be interesting to you.
These are 5 strengths you must have to be able to have a successful relationship. They are not in any particular order of relevance.
I can’t emphasize enough how this is important in every successful relationship. How you treat someone is based on the love you have for yourself. If you don’t cherish you it’s hard to cherish the other person. This is because you can’t give anyone the love you don’t know or you don’t have. Some people have gone through so much in life from family & others around them, they do not know how to love because they haven’t experienced it. When they do experience it they feel like it’s too good to be true. They don’t have any standard of love to compare it to. At the end of the day, they mess things up because they have no idea how to show love. Before you can love someone you first of all need to love you. People who find themselves in these situations usually don’t even think of love for themselves because they think love should come from another person because of that deficiency or imbalance in their lives. These people tend to demand a lot from their partner because they really don’t know what they are looking for. They have this idealistic view of what love should be. If you are one of them, you need to know that even if everyone could not show you love, you can’t demand it all of it from one person. The best you can do for yourself is LEARN how to love yourself. If you didn’t do this soul searching before you dived into another relationship take sometime to do that or you will end up breaking another person’s heart because you can’t settle for one thing & you always find someone that is more in love with you.
Honestly speaking, your standards are broken & you are just experimenting with your emotions. Okay great ! Now that I have your attention; stop draining others for love it’s either you get tired or they get tired. Okay so let’s do a quick review of your last relationship. If you probably left because you felt the love wasn’t enough or the person left you because they said you are too demanding then all I can say is you need to do some soul searching, learn how to love yourself & others. According to Medical News Today, “self-love and compassion are key for mental health and well-being, keeping depression and anxiety at bay”. You need self love to be able to function properly & be in a successful relationship.
Loyalty is one word people take for granted a lot. You can be in love and not be loyal. Boomer: NOT EVERYONE THAT LOVES YOU IS LOYAL TO YOU.Every relationship requires loyalty but we live in a generation where loyalty means so little to so many people & disloyalty is the order of the day. I mean we all remember the great reveal on twitter where one guy was dating 2 ladies at the same time. The side chick thought she was the main & after posting his picture on twitter she realized she had been number 2 all along. She was rather going to blame the other lady for taking her boyfriend but it was the exact opposite. How embarrassing right ? But this is what is happening around us. The sad part is the backlash doesn’t do to the guy but the women involved. Dear ladies chasing people’s fathers can you please listen, you are enjoying the money okay but this ripple effect will hit you in a different part of life. Leave these men alone girl! You are loyal to a married man how does this work ? Loyalty is supposed to be a two way street. That old man you are loyal to he’s not loyal to you not is he loyal to his wife. Your loyalty is supposed to be one of the most cherished values as an individual. You should make it your goal that if someone gets into a relationship with you they earn your loyalty automatically. They do not have to beg for it.
You can’t be indiscipline in a relationship. I mean you can’t afford that. You want to be discipline in the sense that you keep to your word, you do what you are supposed to do [the checkups, calls, messages],etc. Indiscipline is one of the causes of disloyalties. You need to be able to commit to your word. We can’t make promises & not fulfill them when we know very well that we are not in the position to. You need to be disciplined & stick to the “terms & conditions” of your relationship. Learn to respect the other person’s boundaries & make sure you guard those boundaries dearly. When you are discipline even after the fight you still call them to checkup on them anyway even though you may be angry. You learn to put your feelings aside & do what is right. Being disciplined is not been controlled but your feelings & letting go of things that may way the relationship down. There is no in-between for discipline it’s either you are or you are not. I think we should all make it our goal to be disciplined in our relationships so that it can turn out to be a successful relationship.
You can’t be in a relationship not be truthful. Let them understand your situation before you start dating. You can’t pretend to be someone by the day & be another person at night. You have to come clean with what you do for a living, where you live, where you come from, etc. The moment you lie from the beginning you have to lie to the very end because you’ll need to cover up your lies with more lies. Lies are not good so the moment you start with lies there’s a high possibility it won’t end well. You can’t live a lie for long dear. Dear, you can’t be spending all your money just to keep up with a lie. You don’t have a car that’s okay. You don’t have certain things that’s fine if this person truly cares they will look beyond all that but you can’t lie & take it back then it means you can’t be trusted. My dear, you may lose the person’s trust forever. Don’t live a life trying to impress everyone with things that you don’t have. My dear, it doesn’t make sense!! Don’t waste anyone’s time with lies. A successful relationship is not built in the air, it takes hard work.
Respect is one of the things that can easily be taken for granted. It is rather unfortunate that we see people who say they love each other but the respect factor is missing for one of them or both of them. The respect someone gives you in a relationship shows how much of it he will give you when you settle down. Respecting your partner makes things easier because when you respect them there are things you will never do. The respect has to be mutual if its not please don’t waste your own time. Respect is a requirement for a successful relationship so respect your partner. Respect each other but do not be too diplomatic about it or it may be misinterpreted.