You can not love someone if you do not love & appreciate yourself. Society is gradually shaping your thinking to believe that you must love your partner more than yourself. If that’s not done then it’s not love. We have been fed with idealistic ideologies of what life should be through movies, songs, etc. At some point we do not even believe in ourselves and our feelings because it doesn’t match the standards of society.
These standards were probably created as scenes in a movie where obsession is demonstrated as love. Obsession & love are different things. It is because of this ideology of what love should be that’s why we have people staying in abusive relationships & unacceptable situations. Some people can not tell the difference between obsession and love. At the end of the day, when the obsession begins to manifest in ways that they could never imagine then they feel stuck. Stuck in a relationship that was supposed to be perfect because you thought he or she cared so much but it was obsession. Now that she’s stalking your every move you are frustrated? Can I tell you something ? You asked for it. You choose not to read through the lines & you ignored the signs.
It’s time you learnt that nothing is really perfect especially when it comes to relationships. There is no ideal man or woman but you can have someone close to that. I’ve listened people say to me I want a woman who is this & that, & a man that is this & that. At the end of the day I don’t see you valuing yourself, I don’t see you trying to add value to yourself. This is when I know you’re not serious & ready for what you want. So there’s this new thing going around where people now say I’m attracted to “sapiosexual” women or men. This only means attracted to intelligent people. I sat down one day, after someone had brought this up and I asked myself like who on this earth will like to date someone that’s dumb.
On a real note, who will wake up one day & say I’m attracted to dumb people. No matter how intelligent someone is you still look out for their character, relation with others, morals and others. I think people are too quick to jump on to trends without understanding what they as individuals want. It is easy to get confused in an evolving world like this. The earlier you realize that you probably will not get someone that’s a 100% perfect, the easier your mind can identify what it wants. Lately people quit relationships because the person doesn’t spoil them enough, doesn’t take them on vacations, the person is too clingy, you don’t like their personality, etc.
Sometimes I just wonder if some of these people will find what they are looking for. You have dated 5 ladies this year and all of them left you, my guy it’s time to check yourself. Maybe you are demanding for perfection that you may not even be close to yourself. You are a beautiful lady & you think your beauty is what will get you places ? It might get you there but your behavior, value & worth is what will keep you there.
Let’s stop all these movie idealistic expectations from people that have daily problems & responsibilities. You are not in a movie, this is the real world.
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